Embracing Unconditional Love, and the Science of Connection This Valentine’s Day
As February 14th approaches, hearts and storefronts bloom with familiar symbols of affection: red roses, heart-shaped chocolates, and sentimental cards. Yet, beneath these traditional gestures lies an invitation to explore love in deeper, more enduring ways—ways that not only nourish our relationships but also sustain our planet and our inner selves.
Unconditional Love: A Philosophy for Every Day
Valentine’s Day often emphasizes romantic love, but the essence of true love extends far beyond fleeting passion. Philosophers have long pondered the nature of unconditional love—a form of care that transcends transactions, expectations, and imperfections. As discussed on Philosophy Talk, unconditional love challenges us to accept others as they are, without seeking reward or reciprocity. It is an active commitment to support another’s flourishing, even when it requires patience and selflessness.
This kind of love is not confined to partners; it encompasses friends, family, and even strangers. It encourages us to embrace vulnerability, practice empathy, and cultivate resilience. When we approach love as a daily practice, we enrich our lives with connection and meaning that endures far beyond the chocolates and flowers.
Sustainable Love: Protecting the Planet as an Act of Care
Love also calls us to nurture the world around us. Sustainability and affection are not separate realms; they intertwine. NEFF USA reminds us that showing love for the Earth can be a powerful Valentine’s gesture. Consider these eco-friendly ideas:
- Choose locally-sourced flowers or potted plants over imported bouquets.
- Opt for ethical chocolates with fair-trade certifications.
- Craft handmade gifts or upcycle materials to create something unique and personal.
- Plan an outdoor experience together—a hike, a beach walk, or tree planting.
These acts demonstrate that our love extends not only to people but to the ecosystems that sustain life. They also inspire us to reconsider consumption and embrace creativity in how we express affection.
The Science of Connection: Neuroscience and Digital Chemistry
Modern research reveals that love is not just an emotion but a complex chemical and neurological process. Insights from Novisali highlight how neuroscience and digital chemistry help us understand the biological underpinnings of connection. Oxytocin, often called the “love hormone,” fosters bonding, trust, and empathy. Dopamine fuels desire and excitement, while serotonin stabilizes our mood.
Understanding these processes can deepen our appreciation for the physiological and psychological aspects of love. It also encourages us to cultivate environments that trigger positive chemical responses—through physical touch, laughter, shared experiences, and digital platforms designed to enhance human connection rather than diminish it.
Evaluating Relationships: Insights from Stockholm University
Understanding the health of our relationships is key to nurturing lasting love. Researchers at Stockholm University have developed a relationship evaluation tool known as the “Valentine Scale,” which centers around seven key questions designed to help individuals assess their partnerships—whether romantic, familial, or friendships:
- Do you and your partner support each other’s personal growth?
- Do you feel valued and appreciated in your relationship?
- Are you and your partner able to communicate openly and honestly?
- Do you feel emotionally secure with your partner?
- Are you satisfied with your physical intimacy?
- Do you and your partner share similar values and future goals?
- Are you both willing to work through difficulties together?
Reflecting on these questions can offer valuable insights, fostering deeper understanding and growth in both new and long-term relationships. The evaluation with the Valentine Scale (in Swedish) can be found below at references.
The Language of Love: Words and Art That Last
Love is not only felt but expressed through symbols, stories, and art. The Marginalian and The Public Domain Review remind us of the timeless role that words and imagery play in capturing love’s nuances. From Sandol Stoddard’s whimsical tale of a peculiar cat to Julie Paschkis’s celebration of the beauty of language, love finds expression in the everyday and the extraordinary.
Historical artifacts like the 17th-century “Emblems of Love” and allegorical maps depicting the journey of courtship offer glimpses into how past generations navigated affection. The heart, an enduring symbol across cultures, appears in art not merely as a romantic icon but as a reminder of love’s complexity—its joys, pains, and resilience.
Expand your empathy to grow love
To increase love in your life, expand your ambition and ability to be empathic. Developing empathy deepens your understanding of others and fosters stronger, more caring connections. Here are six ways to grow your empathy:
- Be Curious About Strangers – Engage with people outside your usual circle to broaden your perspective.
- Challenge Prejudices – Look beyond assumptions and seek common ground with others.
- Experience Other Lives – Step into others’ shoes by immersing yourself in their experiences.
- Listen Actively – Truly hear what others are saying and open up about your own emotions.
- Drive Social Change – Use empathy as a force to inspire collective action and improve society.
- Expand Your Imagination – Picture yourself in the lives of others, including those with whom you disagree.
By nurturing these empathic habits, you cultivate deeper love and understanding in your relationships and your broader community.
Gratitude: The Heartbeat of Love
At its core, love flourishes in gratitude. The illustrators Icinori, whose work radiates appreciation for the beauty in the ordinary, remind us to say “thank you” more often—to our partners, friends, and even ourselves. Gratitude transforms love from an occasional celebration to a continuous act of noticing and cherishing.
Exploring the Potential of the In-Between: An Art Exhibition
As we reflect on the multifaceted nature of love, we invite you to join us in March for our upcoming art exhibition, ‘Exploring the #Potential of the In-Between.’ This event will welcome visitors to experience artworks that explore the spaces between connection and separation, love and loss, growth and stillness. It is a celebration of the nuanced, often overlooked, dimensions of relationships and the bonds we form with each other and the world.
This Valentine’s Day, let us reimagine love as a force that binds us to each other and to the Earth. Through unconditional acceptance, sustainable choices, scientific understanding, thoughtful relationship evaluation, artistic expression, and daily gratitude, we weave a love story that endures—one that blossoms long after the roses fade.
References
Unconditional Love (by Philosophy Talk)
Show your Love for Sustainability (by nefuusa)
Valentinskalan (Valentine Scale, by Stockholm University
Six habits of highly empathic people
About Novisali
Novisali, (alias Liselotte Engstam), is besides her roles as professional board member and advisor, a multi-media artist, with a curious, explorative mind and an ambition to learn and extend art experiences to current and new audiences using both traditional and new digital mediums. More information and exhibitions can be found via Novisali.com
This blog post was is also shared at the blog of www.liselotteengstam.com, with the artist name Novisali.